Saturday, October 1, 2011

Maxine Questions

If 4 out of 5 people suffer from diarrhea...does that mean that one out of five enjoys it?
If people from Poland are called Poles, then why aren't people from Holland called Holes?
If a pig loses its voice, is it disgruntled?
Why is a person who plays the piano called a pianist, but a person who drives a racecar is not called a racist?
If it's true that we are here to help others, then what exactly are the others here for?
If lawyers are disbarred and clergymen defrocked, then doesn't it follow that electricians can be delighted, musicians denoted, cowboys deranged, models deposed, tree surgeons debarked, and dry cleaners depressed?
If Fed Ex and UPS were to merge, would they call it Fed UP? ?
Do Lipton Tea employees take 'coffee breaks?'
Why do they put pictures of criminals up in the Post Office? What are we supposed to do, write to them?
Is it true that you never really learn to swear until you learn to drive?
Whatever happened to Preparations A through G?
As income tax time approaches, did you ever notice: When you put the two words 'The ' and 'IRS' together, it spells 'THEIRS'?

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